Bonnie Parker

Wow. Publish it. Really. After: Change "2 ton" to two ton. It's distracting. And "little Timmy"? You can do better. There are other ways to let us know that it's ...

Hi! Brave work! My first impression was that it started off like many other things I've read. Such as, I feel like I've seen the section around "For the most ...

This has a very "Model Behavior" and "Gossip Girl" feel to it. I like it. And don't get me wrong, it's very unique as well. It seems like you were ...

Is this non-fiction? I like this story a lot. It's very eerie, like one of those open-ended Misty of Chincoteague books. Maybe I'm stating the obvious, but you start the ...

This is very nice and simple. What you have to aim for with a simple piece is to keep it simple. Sometimes the intrigue in simple writing is that it's ...

I'm a big fan of this genre. And kind of hard to please. This prologue makes me want to read some more. That's nice. You use a lot of good ...

Hi, honey. Your ideas for this story have potential, but, of course, I have a few suggestions. 1. She either has an accent or doesn't. (You'll have to excuse me ...

Hi. It's so nice to be able to convey emotions through words on a page, but it can be so difficult to do. You have succeeded. At 13. Be proud. ...